In the future will the kids say "well you're looking very 4chan today"?
Everyone from your little brother to marginally-sophisticated tech and media writers have spent 'nuff time on 4chan's /b/ board, but did you know there's a Fashion board on the popular site for 'tards? It's truly a mixed bag. On one hand, it's exactly what you'd expect, but on the other hand there are a few non-butthole--jpg-related surprises (they're really into APC jeans). And if you love saying to yourself, "oh wait, everyone else is into this now too" you should go on the site for a reality check every once in a while. Without getting too trendy, here's a look at the top 10 fashion trends for Spring/Summer, as spotted on 4chan.
10: Fashion ROCKS!
In this thread, users listed what they're wearing and what their listening to. Best answer was "ugly shit. M83 - unrecorded", and then someone posted a picture of a body builder giving another body builder a piggyback ride. Also, If you thought you were cooler than most, this guy just called you - "desert boots, black jeans, flannel(?), gza - living in the world today". Srry.
TREND-O-METER SCORE: 4/10
9: Shopping Online
Simple request: good sites for buying fashion shit. Simple response: google.com. Case closed.
TREND-O-METER SCORE: 8/10
8: Loungewear
When you're not at work on the computer, and you're not at your friends house playing video games, but chillin' out a home on the computer, what should you wear? 4chan delves into the important category of loungewear, suggestions ranging from the classic white tee and boxers combo to Nudie jeans and fingerless gloves to X-Box 360 pajama bottoms and "a tee I haven't washed in two years." Stylin and proflin'.
TREND-O-METER SCORE: 3/10
7: Haircuts In The $10 Plus Range & Having Friends
Why wait around for Glenn O'Brien to get back to you when you can have the gratification of instant feedback from a jury of your peers. One 4chan user posed the reasonable query - continue to get $10 trim 4-5 times a year or go to a salon for an actual, adult, human being haircut. Obviously this guy's answered his own question. However one user interjected - "do you not have friends? Do some of your friends have haircuts?" Well put.
TREND-O-METER SCORE: 4/10
6: Ross: Dress For Less
This spring, as the recession continues, guys are still looking for great deals. On 4chan, users debated the merit of Ross. On one hand, they have "good shampoos and conditioners" and is "the place for a real man's fashion." On the other hand "it's the same as TJ Maxx." Either way, big, huge trend here, obviously.
TREND-O-METER SCORE: 9/10
5: Touching Dicks Together
In the thread "how low do your balls hung" two dudes touch their weenies together in a jpg. However, as one reader pointed out "not gay, balls aren't touching". So, we'll see this trend in GQ, but not Details. You will be doing this come June bros. Sorry.
TREND-O-METER SCORE: 10/10
4: No Fat Chicks
In a topic titled "is it true that only thin women are beautiful?" the conversation quickly turned to "no fat chicks." So, this Spring, you won't see any fat chicks. "having a girlfriend with an eating disorder does have it's advantages," said one poster. Then a "eurofag" was "detected."
TREND-O-METER SCORE: 2/10
3: White Jean on Males
Two out of three fashion board readers agree: dudes can rock white jeans. The one dissenting party says do it only if you're Italian. Another hot tip, dont' wear all white. Yeah, thanks David Duke.
TREND-O-METER SCORE: 6.5/10
2: Gold Shoes
Pretty sure this thread is troll bait - man looks for gym shoes, only wears them 4 hours weekly, would like them to stand out. Thankfully the trolls weren't far - within a couple hours the reasonable suggestion of gold shoes was proposed. I'm into it.
TREND-O-METER SCORE: 7/10
1: Being Very Overweight and 40
The hottest trend spotted on the site. Some of the best suggestions for this look include "wearing suits all the fucking time." Another commenter chimed it "when I reach 30, I'll probably commit suicide." But he's just being part of the problem and not part of the solution. Another good solution was "lots of coats/cardigans/sweatshirts" which is perfect for a fat guy in the Summer. Well played.
TREND-O-METER SCORE: 10/10
Total Comments: 5